An Open Letter to My Adversaries


You probably don’t know me very well. And you might have heard some terrible things about me, and some are presumably true. I’m most likely not your cup of tea, and I am undoubtedly an acquired taste. Perhaps you thought I was quite witchy when you met me. I tend to talk too loud, make bad dad jokes, and use sarcasm more often than a person should.

However, I’m not as bad as you inevitably think I am. I am kind, and honest, and weird. I pride myself on being a good friend. I love a good adventure. Food is life, and I can binge eat with the best of them. I love movies and TV shows. Reading is my vice. Girly magazines are my guilty pleasure, even though I know they are awful for my brain. I love Taylor Swift, and I tend to be a fan girl for many things. I love a good glass of wine, gin, and a margarita.

I tend to come off strong. If I intimidate you, that’s alright, but don’t be delusional. I’ve seen, heard, and felt more atrocious things than I care to discuss. I’ve earned my right to come off strong. I’m not mean, and I’m actually pretty amicable when it comes to most things.

I don’t usually cry, but I am a chronic over-worrier. I am a logical person. So I need a reason and explanation for everything.

That being said…

You are completely and utterly entitled to your opinion. And to be honest, I will be fine if you choose to dislike me, but I won’t be if you decide this on false terms.

But, just so you know, I have stayed up late at night wondering what I could have possibly done to make you dislike me. Chances are I’ve had stress dreams about you. I may have even ranted to my friends about it.

I’ve decided that sometimes there is no explanation, although I desperately wish there was. Maybe you need an external focus to deal with your internal insecurities. Maybe you need a target to avoid other problems you have in your life. Or maybe you’re just bored and you know I won’t put up a fight. So if you need me to be the focus of your hatred for whatever reason, go ahead.

But, if you ever decide to bury that hatchet you’ve been carrying around all by yourself (it has got to be heavy), let me know. We would probably get along if you gave it a chance. I will welcome you with open arms, and probably margaritas.

Love and hate are truly just two sides of one coin.

Stay Classy,



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